Madhawa Learns To Blog

.net, c#, sql, OOAD and more mad memory dumps...

Saturday, August 04, 2007

Dark in here

A woman takes a lover home during the day while her husband is at work.
Her 9 year old son comes home unexpectedly, sees them, and hides in the
bedroom cupboard to watch.Just after getting into bed the woman's husband
also comes home unexpectedly, she tells her lover to hide in the cupboard,
not realising that the little boy is in there.
After a little while the little boy says, "Dark in here.
The man, who obviously got a real fright not expecting to hear anything,
let alone from a little boy says, "Yes, it is."
Boy - "I have a football."
Man - "That's nice."
Boy - "Want to buy it?"
Man - "No, thanks."
Boy - "My dad's outside."
Man - "OK, how much?"
Boy - "$250"
In the next few weeks, it happens again that the boy and the lover are in
the cupboard together.
Boy - "Dark in here."
Man - "Yes, it is."
Boy - "I have football boots."
The lover, remembering the last time, asks the boy, "OK How much this
time?"
Boy - "$750"
Man - "Sold."
A few days later, the boys' father says to the boy, "Grab your boots and
football, let's go outside and have a game of soccer.
The boy says, "I can't, I sold my ball and boots."
The father asks, "How much did you sell them for and to who?"
The boy says, "To a friend of mine for a $1,000."
The father says, "That's a terrible thing to do, overcharging your friend
like that". "That's four times what they cost when they were new, I'm
going to take you to church and make you confess your terrible sin."
They go to the church and the father makes the little boy sit in the
confession booth and he closes the door.
The boy says, "Dark in here".
The priest says, "Don't start that shit again you little prick, you're in
my cupboard now"!!


Thanks Purvis for sending this e-mail. :D

Tuesday, July 31, 2007

Dumber

A young boy enters a barber shop and the barber whispers to his Customer,
"This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you."

The barber puts a five rupee coin in one hand and two one rupee coins(1+1=2) in the other, then calls the boy over and asks,
"Which do you want, son?"

The boy takes the two one rupee coins and leaves.
"What did I tell you?" said the barber. "That kid never learns!"

Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of
the ice cream store. "Hey, son! May I ask you a question?
Why did you take two one rupee coins instead of five rupee coin?"

The boy licked his cone and replied,
"Because THE DAY I TAKE THE FIVE RUPEE COIN, THE GAME IS OVER
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Moral: When you think the other person is dumb, you are making a fool of yourself.

Friday, February 02, 2007

The Buffalo Theory

A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo.

And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the
back that are killed first This natural selection is good for the herd
as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps
improving by the regular killing of the weakest members.

In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the
slowest brain cells.

Excessive intake of alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells.

But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In
this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells,
making the brain a faster and more efficient machine.

That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers."

Moral of the story: Keep drinking!!!!

Tuesday, October 31, 2006

How do you decide who to marry?

I got this funny mail from my friend Purvis. Although this is rather old one thought to share with you since it’s so hilarious. :)

Check this out...

HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHO TO MARRY?

(1) You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you
like sports, she should like it that you like sports, and she
should keep the chips and dip coming.
- Alan, age 10

(2) No person really decides before they grow up who they're going
to marry. God decides it all way before, and you get to find out
later who you're stuck with.
- Kristen, age 10


WHAT IS THE RIGHT AGE TO GET MARRIED?

(1) Twenty-three is the best age because you know the person
FOREVER by then.
- Camille, age 10

(2) No age is good to get married at. You got to be a fool to get
married.
- Freddie, age 6 (very wise for his age)


HOW CAN A STRANGER TELL IF TWO PEOPLE ARE MARRIED?

(1) You might have to guess, based on whether
they seem to be yelling at the same kids.
- Derrick, age 8


WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR MUM AND DAD HAVE IN COMMON?

(1) Both don't want any more kids.
- Lori, age 8


WHAT DO MOST PEOPLE DO ON A DATE?

(1) Dates are for having fun, and people should use them to get to
know each other. Even boys have something to say if you listen long
enough.
- Lynnette, age 8 (isn't she a treasure)

(2) On the first date, they just tell each other lies and that
usually gets them
interested enough to go for a second date.
- Martin, age 10


WHAT WOULD YOU DO ON A FIRST DATE THAT WAS TURNING SOUR?

(1) I'd run home and play dead. The next day I would call all the
newspapers and make sure they wrote about me in all the dead
columns.
-Craig, age 9


WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KISS SOMEONE?

(1) When they're rich.
- Pam, age 7

(2) The law says you have to be eighteen, so I wouldn't want to
mess with that.
- Curt, age 7

(3) The rule goes like this: If you kiss someone, then you should
marry them and have kids with them. It's the right thing to do.
- Howard, age 8


IS IT BETTER TO BE SINGLE OR MARRIED?

(1) It's better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need
someone to clean up after them.
- Anita, age 9 (bless you child)


HOW WOULD THE WORLD BE DIFFERENT IF PEOPLE DIDN'T GET MARRIED?

(1) There sure would be a lot of kids to explain, wouldn't there?
- elvin, age 8

HOW WOULD YOU MAKE A MARRIAGE WORK?

(1) Tell your wife that she looks pretty, even if she looks like a Truck.
Ricky, age 10

Tuesday, July 18, 2006

Check out my new tech blog....

http://www.geekswithblogs.net/madhawa

Friday, June 16, 2006

Claymore mines - like the one thought to have been used to blow up a bus in Sri Lanka

Unlike most mines, claymores are placed on top of the ground rather than underneath, and can be detonated remotely at a moment for maximum impact. They fire steel shrapnel as far as 250 metres in a fan shape in front of where they have been placed...

Wednesday, June 14, 2006

Error while trying to run project: Unable to start debugging on the web server.

Error while trying to run project: Unable to start debugging on the web server.

Today one of my friends faced this problem and asked me what’s wrong it may be. This is a frequently asking question. And I know not only him but you also have faced this problem at least once in your asp.net life.

So here is the article from Microsoft which provides a list of articles that describes some of the most common problems you may encounter when you are debugging asp.net applications in visual studio 2003.


http://support.microsoft.com/kb/306172

Two IT guys, gorgeous blonde and new laptop

Got this from a mail sent by AJ. :)

Two IT guys were talking in a bar after work. "Guess what," says
the first IT guy, "I met this gorgeous blonde in a bar."

"What did you do?" says the other IT guy.

"Well, I invited her over to my place, we had a couple of drinks,
we got into the mood and then she suddenly asked me to take all
her clothes off!"

"You're kidding me!" says the second IT guy.

"Nope." says IT guy one. "I took her miniskirt off, and then I
lifted her up and put her on my desk, next to my new laptop."

"Really?" asked the second IT guy. "You got a new laptop?"

Monday, June 12, 2006

Get Ready for Windows Vista

Windows Vista Beta 2 is now available for you to install, test, and enjoy. Here's the information you need to try it now.

http://www.microsoft.com/windowsvista/getready/default.mspx

Thursday, June 08, 2006

Let's light an oil lamp /candle to remember our War Heroes

"They shall grow not old,

As we are left grow old,

Age shall not weary them,

Nor the years condemn,

At the going down of the sun,

And in the morning,

We will remember them.

When you go home,

Tell them of us and say,

We gave our tomorrow,

For your today."



Let's light an oil lamp /candle to remember our War Heroes...